A Fake Internet Presence,
Subject: Top 20 Engineers' Terms (fwd)
Top 20 Engineers' Terminologies
- 1. A NUMBER OF DIFFERENT APPROACHES ARE BEING TRIED
- - We are still pissing in the wind.
- 2. EXTENSIVE REPORT IS BEING PREPARED ON A FRESH APPROACH TO THE PROBLEM
- - We just hired three kids fresh out of college.
- 3. CLOSE PROJECT COORDINATION
- - We know who to blame.
- 4. MAJOR TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH
- - It works OK, but looks very hi-tech.
- 5. CUSTOMER SATISFACTION IS DELIVERED ASSURED
- - We are so far behind schedule the customer is happy to get it
- 6. PRELIMINARY OPERATIONAL TESTS WERE INCONCLUSIVE
- - The darn thing blew up when we threw the switch.
- 7. TEST RESULTS WERE EXTREMELY GRATIFYING
- - We are so surprised that the stupid thing works.
- 8. THE ENTIRE CONCEPT WILL HAVE TO BE ABANDONED
- - The only person who understood the thing quit.
- 9. IT IS IN THE PROCESS
- - It is so wrapped up in red tape that the situation is about
- 10. WE WILL LOOK INTO IT
- - Forget it! We have enough problems for now.
- 11. PLEASE NOTE AND INITIAL
- - Let's spread the responsibility for the screw up.
- 12. GIVE US THE BENEFIT OF YOUR THINKING
- - We'll listen to what you have to say as long as it doesn't
interfere with what we've already done.
- 13. GIVE US YOUR INTERPRETATION
- - I can't wait to hear this bull!
- 14. SEE ME or LET'S DISCUSS
- - Come into my office, I'm lonely.
- 15. ALL NEW
- - Parts not interchangeable with the previous design.
- 16. RUGGED
- - Too damn heavy to lift!
- 17. LIGHTWEIGHT
- - Lighter than RUGGED.
- 18. YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT
- - One finally worked.
- 19. ENERGY SAVING
- - Achieved when the power switch is off.
- 20. LOW MAINTENANCE
- - Impossible to fix if broken.
Note: I'm not the author, these tidbits were all forwarded to me via
email. Where I know the author, it is given.
The From: header may be the author, or it may just be the person who
forwarded it to me.
Feel free to contact me to claim authorship.