Fiction L
A Fake Internet Presence,
since 1994

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From: unknown
Subject: You know you are from the Bay Area when..

You Know You are From the Bay Area When...

  • You make $100,000 a year, yet still can't find a place to live.
  • Your commute time is 45 minutes and you live 8 miles away from work.
  • Stop asking how much things cost but, ask "How long will it take?"
  • Two-thirds of the people you know are from Boston or New York, but you are living in PST.
  • Know vast differences difference between Thai, Vietnemese, Chinese, Japanese, Cantonese, and Korean food.
  • Your home computer contains mostly hardware/software that is not on the consumer market yet.
  • Go to "The City-SFO" on weekends but don't live there because you like your car.
  • Think that "I'm going to Fry's" is an acceptable excuse to leave the office for a while, and your boss does too.
  • Lost your alarm clock. You'll get to work when you get there.
  • Go to an industrial-heavy-metal bar and see two guys get into a fight over what flavor of unix is better.
  • Own more than 10 articles of clothing that have hardware/software companies printed on them. Bonus for embroidered stuff.
  • You know where Woz Way, Resistor Ave, and Floppy Dr are located.
  • You know where Woz is.
  • You know 280 North runs west, and 680 N runs East.
  • Even though Microsoft employs quite a few programmers in the Bay Area, they only work on Powerpoint, and the company is still the embodiment of Satan.
  • Even if their stock IS worth more than yours.
  • You see a billboard that says "FGPA2ASIC" and aren't fazed
  • When you need the updated Diamond Monster 3D drivers, you just walk across the street.
  • You have more bandwidth in your apartment or condo than most major universities.
  • You scan yardsales for back issues of "Dr. Dobbs."
  • Your favorite computer reseller speaks only Cantonese.
  • Your workplace vending machines dispense "100% natural twig-bars" right next to Jolt cola and Instant Espresso mix.
  • No one brings radios into work - they just use RealAudio and listen to,, or other out of state stations.

Note: I'm not the author, these tidbits were all forwarded to me via email. Where I know the author, it is given.
The From: header may be the author, or it may just be the person who forwarded it to me.
Feel free to contact me to claim authorship.



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