A Fake Internet Presence,
Date: Tue, 27 Jan 1998 22:50:44 -0600 (CST)
From: Barton Warner (warner at digitek.com)
Subject: Computer Chickens (fwd)
How Did The Chicken Cross The Road?
It depends on the type of chicken.
- NT Chicken
- Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure.
- OS/2 Chicken
- It crossed the road years ago, but who wants a big, blue, slow
- Windows 95 Chicken
- You see differently colored feathers while it crosses, but
cook it and it still tastes like ... chicken.
- Microsoft Chicken
- It's already on both sides of the road. And it just bought
- Amiga Chicken
- There are multiple chickens, crossing many roads at the same
time, but they were, unfortunately, marketed as frogs.
- OOP Chicken
- It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.
- Assembler Chicken
- First it builds the road ...
- C Chicken
- It crosses the road without looking both ways.
- C++ Chicken
- The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you'd simply refer to
him on the other side.
- VB Chicken
- Delphi Chicken
- The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other
- Java Chicken
- If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, the server will
download one to the other side. (Of course, this is a chicklet.)
- Web Chicken
- Jumps out onto the road, turns right and just keeps on running.
- Gopher Chicken
- Tried to run but got flattened by the Web chicken.
- Newton Chicken
- Can't cluck, can't fly and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it
across the road in your pocket!
- Cray Chicken
- Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in
liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side fully cooked.
- Quantum Logic Chicken
- The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all
sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.
- Lotus Chicken
- Don't you dare try to cross the road the same way we do!
- Macintosh Chicken
- No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross
the road; so there's no way to tell it to.
- COBOL Chicken
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING
Note: I'm not the author, these tidbits were all forwarded to me via
email. Where I know the author, it is given.
The From: header may be the author, or it may just be the person who
forwarded it to me.
Feel free to contact me to claim authorship.