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From: Barton Warner (warner at gozer.isdn.uiuc.edu)
Subject: Microsoft the AutoMaker

Received Unattributed.


Top Ten Ways Things Would Be Different if Microsoft Built Cars

  1. A particular model year wouldn't be available until after that year, instead of before.
  2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have to buy a new car.
  3. Occasionally your car would just die for no reason, you'd have to restart it, and, for some strange reason, you would just accept this.
  4. You could only have one person at a time in your car, unless you bought a car '95 or a car NT, but then you'd have to buy more seats.
  5. You would be constantly pressured to upgrade your car. Wait a sec, it's that way NOW!
  6. Sun Motorsystems would make a car that was solar powered, twice as reliable, 5 times as fast, but only ran on 5% of the roads.
  7. The oil, alternator, gas, and temperature warning lights would be replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.
  8. People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they had been available in other brands for years.
  9. We'd all have to switch to Microsoft Gas (tm).
  10. Ford, General Motors and Chrysler would all be complaining because Microsoft was putting a radio (probably an A.M. radio at that) in all its models.

Note: I'm not the author, these tidbits were all forwarded to me via email. Where I know the author, it is given.
The From: header may be the author, or it may just be the person who forwarded it to me.
Feel free to contact me to claim authorship.

 

 

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